Wednesday, February 11, 2009

A List Of People I Would Like To See Tragically Killed Or At The Very Least Maimed

This is a list of people I would not care if they died and probably rejoice a little if they had. I know this sounds extreme and heartless, its meant to be.

I must proclaim that I have no intention of killing anyone or harming them but a tear will not be shed by me if something happened to them.... if something does happen to any of these people.. I did not do it!! So here you go... in no particular order. We'll start with 10.

Side Note: I reserve the right to revise this list at anytime as deemed fit by me!

1. Barack Obama - It is widely know that I am not a fan of this dude. I think his message of socialism is actually bad for this country and in the end his policies will prove to harm this country more than it would help. Besides we are overdue for a presidential assassination. He's looking for a solution to the economic crisis... here's the solution that has worked many times in America's history... WAR! Find someone to blow up and our economy will get much much better... just make sure you win decisively and fast. Plus his message of change is bullshit... he's a fake!

2. Milorad Blagojević (Rod Blago) - This guy is a complete disgrace to the state of Illinois and to the USA. He has single handedly made a mockery of our country by parading his impeachment all over the media looking for public support when public support would not help him. He lives in his own world where things are back-ass-wards which does not say much for our country's leaders as a whole.. I mean how can a certified lunatic get elected to public office... oh wait never mind we had Bill Clinton and Barack Obama as presidents.. but still...he needs killin'

3. Hillary Clinton - She made the list simply because of her voice... that voice is enough to make me want to poke my own eyeballs out, stab myself with a spork and drown in a bath tub full of female menstruation. She really hasn't done anything except pose as a woman because clearly she is really a man. Now she's secretary of state... great... other countries are gonna want to bomb us now because she has the worlds most annoying voice.. you know the one... like your mother.. all mothers do this!

4. Paul David Hewson (Bono from U2) - He made this list mainly because his music fucking sucks. I hate U2 and they should all be sent to GITMO and listen to his own music 24/7 forever! As far as his music goes.. he is an Irishman that starts a song by counting in Spanish but fucks it up by counting 1...2....3...14! What the fuck do they teach those kids in Ireland?!?! No wonder they are drunk all the time... they can't count right! Then you add on his causes.. which cause is it this week Bono?! Starving kids or the environment?!?! I bet this douche bag as one of those bingo tumblers full of different causes and picks a new one every week. He is supposedly a musician and musicians should just make music that people like and make money..that is it.. Bono can't even do that... he should die.

5. Osama Bin Laden - Need I say more?! He's probably already dead so no big deal.

6. Nacy Pelosi - This bitch is 3rd in line for head of our great country once known as the USA (We are now the USSA since we are now all socialists) since she is the speaker of the house. She is on this list for many reasons... the first for just being damn annoying not to mention she is from California which means she's really stupid. I honestly think the world would end if Barack and Biden both died and she became president.. so basically she is on the list because she's a skirt... a broad plus she has had more face lifts than Joan Rivers.. I mean she is like 80 years old but looks like a fashion mannequin at JC Pennys!

7. Dennis Kucinich - He is my congressma...uh...thing here in the 10th district in CLE. This guy's is a fucking moron... he was once mayor of CLE when he was like 12 yrs old and thanks to him we became the first major US city to go into default. Some now years later he injected the drinking water with some type of mind erasure chemical and got elected to congress by the same people he fucked in the 70's. Now to top it all off he runs for president every 4 years... a popular talk show host here in CLE calls him Captain Homogenized because he only gets 1% of the vote. All he does is waste the taxpayers money by running and in the last election he didn't give back his left over money he got to run from the government and they had to go after him for it... I mean who does that..really?! Plus he hangs out with Shirley McClain who is a crazy old bat anyway and they talk to aliens together... what a nut job!

Geraldo Rivera - Not much to say here... this guy is one of the sleaziest, annoying people on the face of the planet. He supposedly went to law school but I some how thing this is a fabrication. Who wastes a law degree on becoming a sleazy journalist. This is the same guy that got kicked out of the embed program during the Iraq War for disclosing his platoon's position during battle on live television and most recently chased down Blago (#2 on this list) on the street after his interview was canceled.. most dignified reporters just keep their mouth shut.. not Geraldo... he runs down a moving car and whines like a fucking child. He is a disgrace to journalists every where and shame on FOX NEWS for employing him.. he must be sucking the bosses dick or something.

9. Al Gore - He's a liar and a thief! He convinced himself and many of you sheep out there that he invented the internet.. yeah.. not true. He also made a stupid movie about the global warming myth which really was a bogus autobiography wrapped in hippie propaganda... if you think that global warming is real than please explain to me why Obama's inauguration was the coldest day in many years and why I had 2 feet of snow in my yard? I saw a show about the creation of Earth (yeah there was no great god on this show) they said that greenhouse gases and global warming helped create the earth and now it regulates the Earth's temperature... so basically global warming if it does exist is the Earth's way of keeping everything at status quo... so go fuck yourself! Plus he looks damn stupid with a beard.

10. Bill Clinton - This douche bag needs no explanation but I will explain for you stupid people. As our 42nd president who has access to every covert agency and/or groups in the world, decided in his infinite wisdom to cheat on his wife. He is not on the list for that because lets face it... look at Hillary... would you fuck that?! No he is on the list for cheating on his wife with an intern in the oval office and getting caught... how can you possibly get caught?!?! JFK never got caught!!!! Then it gets better.. he then lied to congress about it and perjured himself, not to mention he lied to the American people about it... then... he got impeached and never was prosecuted for perjury... who the fuck was the genius that was dropped that ball?? I if had done that I'd be in prison for the rest of my natural life!!
Before any of you tree hugging faggot hippies say he did great things for our country fuck off.. he did nothing but fuck up. During his 2 terms in office he allowed us to slip into a recession that George W. Bush got us out of... he also had more military troop deployments and actions than any president since FDR... and the best part is... he had the opportunity to kill Osama Bin Laden (#5 on the list) and he passed on the opportunity which then lead to 9/11/2001... thanks Slick Willy...I hope you have a nice long and painful death!

So there you go.. I will probably add more as I get more pissed off while watching the news and watching Obama destroy this country.. if you disagree go fuck yourself!

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Today's Blog Is Brought To You By The Letter Q


So my brother Adam over at I Don't Give 2 Cents, I Throw Quarters had this stupid post he got from some other stupid blogger who got it from another stupid blogger where you are given a letter and you have to come up with 10 things you love that starts with that letter... What a crock... since I don't love anything this should be fun.

I guess you get a letter when you make a comment and since I made a rather vulgar comment (big surprise) removing his man card because he sprouted titties and a vagina with his list... all girl things..what a fag.

So as a result I got the letter Q.. this was obviously meant to get back at me since Q is the least used letter in the alphabet... too bad for him I out smarted him and knew that he was going to give me this letter so I got this whole damn list together before he gave it to me.

If you really want to play post your comment and I will give you some obscure letter and then make fun of what you love!


1. Quickie
I mean come on no one likes to waste their time with foreplay.... just get down on it already!

2. Quey
For you idiots this is a young cow... and what do young cows make?? Yup Veal!!!!! Veal is yummy!
3. The Word Quadrisyllabic
This word is stupid... it means a word with 4 syllables... what is stupid is this word is Pentasyllabic!
The ever famous QWERTY keyboard... without it I never would have gotten my Blackberry and it sure makes things a whole hell of a lot easier to type on my phone let alone making this blog possible... oh, and typewriters!!

5. Quake
As in Earthquake... I really would love another big quake to hit California and it would fall into the sea because I hate Californians.. that state would be nice if it weren't for the idiot people!
6. Quarantine
I think that all stupid people (most of America but mainly Californians) should be quarantined as not to infect the rest of the world with their stupidity and then be exterminated or made into slaves!
7. Quesadillas
Simply put...quite possibly the best Tex-Mex dish ever created!
8. Quiet
There is nothing more valuable in the world than big can of SHUT THE FUCK UP!
9. Quixote
This is a wine made by the makers Stags Leap wine (awesome wine!!!)... despite it being organic (Fucking Hippies) its pretty good (I gots to have much wine to deal with you fuckers!!).
Yeah there is nothing more hilarious than a queef... ok maybe the look on her face after she lets it out.. that's priceless.

So there you go...if you didn't like it I don't care (you are probably from California anyway) and if you did... I still don't care!!

Comment if you want a letter!!

Monday, February 9, 2009

Celebrity Endorsements... The New Plague!

Have you ever noticed the bullshit that celebrities try to get you to do, say, buy, think and vote for? Oh wait... you're probably one of the mindless sheep that actually think celebrities are smart and they know what they are talking about.

You're an idiot.

Celebrities are idiots.

I really don't care what Tiger Woods is drinking... does his special Gatorade make him a better golfer? I think not... but you'll buy it because it has his name on it... and you'll pay more for that privilege... you're an idiot... it is the exact same shit in a bottle that was invented back in the mid 1960's... its just a different color!

Did you send money to those mysterious children in Africa because Sally Struthers said they would die with out everyone donating them money??? Ha Ha... dummy!!! I didn't send money... I guess they died...maybe that's why those commercials aren't on anymore.

Now we have celebrities moving onto network news for Darfur... what a fucking hoax. Do you really think that Brad Pitt and George Clooney left their luxurious mansions to go hang with the Darfur peeps and live in a tent on a pile of elephant shit???

Yeah I really don't think Darfur really exists...I mean come on.. who would name their country Darfur?!?! They hook you with those damn hot words like "genocide" or "refugee camps" If Darfur really exists and what they say is really going on I suggest a new word for it... it will not be genocide but "Natural Selection!" This has been going on since the dawn of time...who are we to stop it... its the survival of the fittest.

Who can forget the biggest celebrity hoax of all time?!?!? Yup you guessed it!!! Al Gore and his global warming!!

Did you watch his stupid movie?? In case you didn't notice it had nothing to do with global warming and everything to do with him... it was an autobiography.. don't believe me??? Then answer me this smarty pants... what did his dead kid have to do with global warming?? Did he die of a sun tan?? Let's set the record straight... the math doesn't work on global warming... it doesn't exist...its just another way celebrities are getting you to part with your money unnecessarily by buying more expensive Hybrid cars and recycled paper...throw on some musicians singing songs about it and now you have to reuse your toilet paper... its bullshit and you are an idiot for believing it....while we are on it... your little causes you join on Facebook and putting some stupid status message about saving the Earth.. yeah it didn't help anything... in fact you just wasted electricity joining that cause and putting it in your status section... you're a fucking idiot!

Speaking of math...this is the best one... this past Presidential election... yeah most of moronic Hollywood drank the Obama Koolaide and endorsed him... hell LeBron James and some gangsta' rapper had a free concert here in CLE for him... this just shows you how stupid celebrities are.

Remember Obama's raise taxes on only those making more that $250,000??? Yeah that means you celebrities! Now who in their right mind would vote for someone that will raise your taxes??? Oh wait he was black... OK that changes everything... NOT!!!! He's still an idiot and the celebrities that cheered him will pay and regret it just as the rest of you are starting to now.

Why can't we get get quality endorsements?

Like Michael Phelps endorsing Zig Zag rolling papers?? Now that's an endorsement that actually means something and is useful or Britney Spears for Surgi Wax Brazilian Complete Waxing Kit.

These are endorsements that people can believe and appreciate and have seen them in action!

So please please please stop doing what these celebrities are spewing out of their mouths! They don't know any more about politics than the guys down at the local watering hole and they don't know more about diets than your doctor... in fact they are dumber than the average person... why would you do what they tell you when they spend their lives pretending to be someone else... just because they played a smart person on TV does not make it true!

An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field.
- Niels Bohr

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Ok New Rule...

.... Would you like to procreate??? Get in line for a breeding license!

Every once in a while it seems the media goes through a cycle that they want to report every single child abuse case in the country at the same time. Maybe it has something to do with the alignment of the stars or Obama makes it happen or something... what ever the case it got me thinking (run & hide now!).

Anyone wishing to have children in the USA should be required to go through a genetic screening, psychological testing and then must apply for a breeding license. This license will only be good for a specified couple to breed... not for individuals to take around to a random mate. Those who attempt to have children without submitting this process will be immediately barred from ever breeding, made sterile and the child in question must be destroyed (read: aborted)

Oh my God I sinned!!! I said abortion!!! Fuck off you stupid right to life people and fuck off you stupid right to choose people... you don't have the right to do anything but what you are told!

I have long said that Hitler was on to something with his master plan.. he just did it the wrong way. Look at it from this point of view: He was just trying to make the world a better place by getting rid of the riff-raff and undesirables... he was just too stoned and stupid to realize when to stop.

What is my basis for this extreme argument?? Turn on the news and you will see.

Here is a short list of the current cases:

"Octuplet Mom" - This 33-year-old Southern California woman who gave birth to octuplets this week has six other children and never expected to have eight more when she took fertility treatment.

2. 'Baby Grace' case - A woman in Texas accused of killing her toddler daughter and dumping the body in Galveston Bay has been found guilty of murder by a jury in Galveston, Texas.

3. Amber Hill case - who drowned her two young daughters in the bathtub of her Cleveland apartment, will be institutionalized indefinitely in a high-security psychiatric clinic.

I mean come on damn it... not one of these women would have passed any of my proposed exams and there would now be no one mourning these children that have been murdered and we would not not be burdened with the cost of raising these children or the cost of the incarceration of these offenders!

Lets briefly look at each of these cases.

"Octuplet Mom": Ok here is a chick that according to her mom has been obsessed with having kids... I ask why? Wanting to have kids is fine... but wanting to have as many as possible?? Her mother must have just fucked her up royally.. I mean how else does one get these ideas and obsessions? So now this chick with no job and no spouse now has 14 children... gonna repeat it for those of you taking notes or retarded... 14 (FOURTEEN) CHILDREN!!!!

Where is the sense of responsibility? I mean you have no job and live on government hand outs...then you go and get knocked up by going to a fertility doctor... BAM!!!! Six kids... you are having trouble making ends meet with those 6 bastard children so what can help you? Yep you guessed it!!! Another trip to the doctor.. BAM!!! 8 more kids!!!

Now we learn that she wants to be famous for this and become known as a child raising expert.. she is currently in hiding..hired a PR firm and is asking $2 million for an interview... as you can see... no interview has taken place... yet... so then the interview comes and the media just justified it. Stupid Fucking Media!

This should be a crime! Take these kids from her and sterilize her.. I mean hell we are already paying for these kids... lets make sure they don't get all fucked up in the head from their mother... oh shit..what if it is genetic?! Kill them all!

'Baby Grace' Mom: So here we have a case where an non attentive mother of a small child plays video games online and meets some random dude from Texas and takes off with this precious little girl and marries this dude. All the time this little girl's father is trying to see her and get custody from an obviously unbalanced mother. All of a sudden... the little girl is missing and a few weeks later some fishermen find a cooler floating in Galveston Bay with her remains in it.

As the case continues it comes out that this is what happens when you are trying to teach your children manners... ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS?

I have children... twins... and I have successfully taught them manners despite their friends' lack of manners and guess what... they don't have cracked skulls.. nor are they in coolers!! Granted there have been times that I've wanted to shake the hell out of them but that damn sign in the delivery room pops up in my know the one... "NEVER EVER EVER SHAKE A BABY".. so I am able to stop the urge.

There is no reason this woman should of had a custody of this child let alone give birth. So there she sits... life in prison in Texas... yup we get to pay for her to live while her young daughter had her life snuffed out at age 2 because she couldn't control herself or her video game husband! AND DON'T BLAME THE VIDEO GAMES!!!!

Amber Hill Case - Now this one really gets me. This fat bitch had 2 children ages 4 and 2. She drowned them in the bathtub and claimed that she was insane because she had postpartum depression. ALL TOGETHER NOW... ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!?!?! 2 years later?!?! I mean I'm no Tom Cruise and I can appreciate the condition but I'm afraid I feel this was not a case of it... here.. watch this story and hear what she says after her verdict!

She's blessed to be not found not guilty?!? Yeah wanna know what that is?!?!?! A slap in the judge's face... it was a thumb on the nose to everyone... it was a "HA HA HA.. I just got away with murder so fuck all ya'll!!!!!" How can she get away with this?!! Oh yeah and guess what!?!?! Yup... once again we have to pay to keep this fat nigger bitch alive!!!

There is a huge problem in this country when these morons do things like this... under my proposed plan this would not happen and if it did.. no trial.. no media.. they just disappear... problem solved. Plus, there's an added bonus... we would eventually be able to breed out all of the ugly people so all of Americans would eventually be really good looking and we would also weed out the stupid people...people like my former neighbors who had their first child taken from them so they had 2 more... now the youngest... age 4 has a bunch of developmental issues and the older has emotional issues.. plus they don't bathe and they are fucking gross and compulsive liars and really really stupid. They should die!!

I think I will send this to His Majesty, President Obama to insert into his stimulus package and help him further his socialist agenda.. hey if you can't beat them.. join them right?!?!

NEXT POST TRAILER: In a time where Americans are so stupid that they believe everything they see on TV... there is a sinister plan... a plan to get you to buy useless shit.... vote for the worst possible candidates... give all of your money to some pretend people on the other side of the world... and buy pet medication. That's right... the invasion of the Celebrity Endorsers!!!